Bitter green

What'€™s wrong with this picture? Oh, I know, it's what's in it. Frisée. Whenever I come across it, frisée never fails to sour my mood.

I come across it a lot, which might be the whole problem. I might be less incensed if it were treated it as it should be: GARNISH. It is not meant to be a full-fledged, deserving bite of salad. But this is exactly what happens when you buy the hideously environmentally damaging boxes of pre-made salad mixes I do too often. Frisée is the star component in such medleys, and if you don't use it you're left with a third of the lettuce you agreed to pay for.

Which leads me to my conspiracy theory. Frisée, because of its wild, craggy branches, takes up enough room in the salad box that it creates the illusion of fullness and value. Frisée is a big RIP-JOB.

Still, it continues to make its sinister way into my life since I am guiltily, but totally, addicted to my salad boxes. And so when preparing dinner, I have little option but to dump a frizzy mass of greens onto my plate, gritting my teeth as the frisée claims centre stage instead of retreating to the edge of the plate where it belongs. Given an inch, it'll take a mile.

As it does, it grabs every bit of dressing available. Dressing clusters in pearls along its spindly tentacles, leaving the other, decent lettuce in the mix dry and wilted—ignored. From that point on, it's disaster, unless you don't mind wanton branches of frisée delightedly penetrating your nostrils as you try to cram them into your gaping mouth, smearing your lipstick all over your face, spraying your clothes and any fellow diners unlucky enough to be present with flecks of oil.

Down with frisée, I say, DOWN with it!

Comments

[Kiley]

p.s. It’s not just salad boxes blighted by wads of frisée – restaurants everywhere have embraced the evil weed. See http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/chronicle/archive/2005/03/02/FDG72BGBVG1.DTL.

[James]

Two comments:

1. It's not really a rip off, in that you're not getting *less* in your salad box because of frisée, because the salad boxes are packaged by mass.

2. How about cutting up the frisée into small bits that decorate the other leaves?

And salad boxes are deeply evil. Just wait until you get to that part of the Omnivore's Dilemma.

[kiley]

Re: #1: It's always good to be disabused of a conspiracy theory.
Re: #2: It's an interesting idea, but I am fundamentally if irrationally opposed to frisée in any shape or form.
Re: The deeply evil salad boxes - I haven't got there yet in the book, but even without that, I can imagine they're brutal. I hope they come up with biodegradable boxes! Whoever they are ...

[Siobhan]

I think the only thing worse that frisee is getting surprise bite of fennel. Licorice does not belong in a salad (or anywhere, for that matter). Not sure if that comes in salad boxes though - I generally avoid them. Though I do get caught up in the whole 'produce box' thing when buying cherry tomatoes...